Thursday, September 28, 2017

A year later...

My last post was just over a year ago. In the months that followed, my husband nearly died from a bleeding ulcer caused by steroid enhanced drugs. The CPR I learned 40 years ago served us well that night. Since that emergency surgery, he has improved dramatically. We know that this improvement is probably temporary, but we will take whatever we can get. Stage 4 cancer in the spine is no joke. Living with constant pain changes the way people act and react. We need to be kind to each other because we have  absolutely no idea what people are experiencing day to day. However, pain or not, the Man lives the life he has preached and taught for decades. He is still one of the most patient people I know, one of the most empathetic. That empathy has not always served him well. It leads to internalizing others' pain and striving to fix things... everything and anything, important and trivial. Regardless, it is who he is and that will not change. He's tried; it doesn't work. So we live each day in gratitude for our huge store of earthly blessings, all pretty much centered around two sons, their wives, and seven grandchildren. These gifts are eternal beings and our prayer today is that we will always be united in faith, into eternity. I have absolutely no idea what that looks like, but I believe it will be and for now, that's enough. Honestly, living in the present is taking all I have so concern for the future will have to wait. Each morning I stand in front of our house, I take a deep breath and thank God for His goodness. My word for the year is joy; I don't want to forget that. Life, gratitude, blessing, joy. Now.